I'm sorry, but this relationship is just not going to "work out" for me. The fact that you make my heart beat fast & leave me breathless are all just part of the honeymoon phase. But after 30 minutes of running together, I have finally realized that you are nothing short of evil. Your red blinking lights taunt me & is a constant reminder that I only burned off 10 calories after all the hard work I put myself through which resulted in my heart (& sides) aching. I would promise to use you again, but we both know that this is not true. We can no longer lie to each other. We must part ways. But don't think that I will not think of you in passing. For the next time I pass you, I will use you as my coat rack while eating my 650 cal burger.
<3, Me.
